Letter to the Self # 12: A Blessing or a Curse?

Letter to the Self # 12: A Blessing or a Curse?

Ramadan Day 11

By Jeewan Chanicka

Dear Self,

Abu Sa’id al Khudri, radiyallah ‘anhu, related that Prophet Muhammed (peace be upon him) said: “The suhur is a meal of blessings, so do not leave it, even if one of you just takes a (gulp) of water, since Allah sends mercy and His angels seek forgiveness for those who take the “The suhur ” Ahmad (3/12 and 44)

Dear Self,

I have seen you spending much time reflecting, as tears well up in your eyes as you remember the many mistakes of your past. Sometimes, our bad deeds, our mistakes can be overwhelming, like a tidal wave submerging us each time we try to raise our heads up. The feeling of difficulty to breathe can be crushing to both our hearts and spirit.

What becomes worse are those “mistakes” that have occurred in or become public. Sometimes the damage that comes from their words and judgment can be debilitating and paralyzing. It seems that some people try to find their perfection in the imperfection of others. Instead of hating the sin and loving the sinner, their words and actions are hateful- all in some bizarre way, in the name of God.

It’s so ironic I think, that people can share selfishness, spite, hate, anger, vengefulness and claim it to be from the One Whose Mercy is greater than His desire to Punish. They find comfort in their self-righteousness as their words, stares and actions continue to fill you with pain. Like someone sticking a knife into an open wound.

Do not be like those people Self, if you want God to forgive you for the many sins that tears fill your eyes about today, then make sure you are working at forgiving those who have hurt you.

Try harder when the personal pain is greater to forgive because we both know, you’ve made some pretty huge mistakes too. You can’t want God to forgive you for those, while you don’t want to forgive others, can you? More importantly, Self, make sure and do not humiliate others, as some have done to you? I know there sometimes are those waiting simply to see you make a mistake so they can throw it in your face but what if God were to humiliate you for your mistakes? As difficult as it is, we have to treat others the way we want to be treated, even if sometimes they are the wrong ones.

Today Self, I want you to remember that even your mistakes have shaped you and brought you to where you are. That you are remorseful is important but do not let the shortsightedness of people tamper with your compassion or your desire to become better in the eyes of God. Too many others become overwhelmed and shut themselves off. People’s negativity and personal guilt turns off their desire to become better. That is exactly what Shaitan wants, to stop you from doing good. Even worse, when you forget how it feels when people treat you that way and you do the same; you may be responsible for turning people away from God. Do you want to bear that responsibility? Remember just like you are a person who made mistakes, they are people who also make mistakes. Forgiveness and Compassion are the lights that engulf the darkness that dwells within our souls.

Self, seek your perfection, in the One who is Most Perfect, not in the imperfection of others. Seek His forgiveness and then commit yourself to start the process of rebuilding, one step at a time. Approach people with love and leave it all in His capable hands. Don’t decide that you will not or cannot attain a certain level of closeness to God because of your mistakes. Simply try. Keep close to those who will support you and remember to continue to challenge yourself to be the best you possible. Not the best you that people will love; the best you that God will love. It is through this, that you will win the love and respect of the people who matter.

After all being the best you, is the quest of life and it is only in your self-discovery that you will truly be happy and fulfilled. Anything else is temporary and will never fill the void that exists in your heart today.



“ God will continue to hold out His Hand at night so that he who has sinned during the day might repent and to hold out His Hand during the day so that the one who has sinned at night might repent and God will continue to do so till the sun rises from the West”. Muslim

Diary Series:
Letter to the Self #11: Purpose
Letter to the Self #10: Let’s Partey
Letter to the Self #9: Looking Good
Letter to the Self #8: Worship
Letter to the Self #7: Rights of the Body
Letter to the Self#6: Time
Letter to the Self #5: Gratitude
Letter to the Self #4: Laziness
Letter to the Self #3: Arrogance
Letter to the Self #2: Ego
Shaban: Letters to the Self

Related Topics:
Happiness Doesn’t Grow on Trees!
Discovering Your Emotional Intelligence
The House of Three Rooms
Developing the Muslim Self Through Martial Arts